Dear Almighty God of Rugby,
Thank you for the privilege of being born in the Western Cape, and hence into the dynasty of the greatest, most successful Currie Cup rugby team ever. I really appreciate it. It could’ve been much worse.
On Saturday, we’ll find ourselves in our third Currie Cup final in a row and it’s going to be a massive game. We need you to watch over fortress Newlands and help us defeat the worthy adversaries that once again come to our doorstep, looking to thwart us, and deny us the honour of tasting the sweet nectar of victory for the 33rd time. We cannot allow this. We need to stand up and hold them off.
That said we do have a lot going for us and we thank you for these blessings. For example, we have Cheslin Kolbe – a man who singlehandedly can take any defence to pieces. To his right we have Senatla – I mean, do the man’s legs even touch the grass? There’s also Juan De Jongh, a star with two of the best feet in the game. We have steady Dimitri, relentless Nizaam, and fiery Rhodes too. Let me not even get started on the world-class Springboks who won’t even be featuring on the day. But I’m getting distracted.
You see god, we have everything we need to win on the day but we need you to help our guys realise this. Please remind them that they will have the support of just about 50 000 fans in the stadium, and countless others watching from home, bars and other fine establishments spread across SA and internationally. In addition, they’ll be pulling on a jersey that has stood of the test of time, soaked with the blood, sweat and tears of some of South Africa’s greatest players.
You know, fans often forget that ultimately there’s not much we can do to influence the result; it’ll come down to the 30 players on the field.
But even so, we will believe and we will do what we can.
We will shout at the TV, we will blame the ref, we will hold thumbs when we go for the sticks and we will scream “miss” when they do. We’ll give it absolutely everything for 80 minutes – all we need is for our boys to do the same, and a little bit of luck from you.
So, Great and Powerful god of rugby, please grant the ref perfect vision, our forwards the strength to withstand that Lions scrum and our backs the pace, power and grace of a gazelle at full flight.
Thanks for listening,